Purpose: This study aimed to understand the essential meanings of suicidal ideation experienced by college student clients. Methods: Data were collected using interviews and observations from six college student clients who had experienced suicidal ideation for approximately six months from January 2021 to June 2021. This study adopted van Manen's hermeneutic phenomenological method of qualitative research. Results: The results derived 24 sub-themes and seven essential themes, the latter being: ‘feeling like a person with serious defects’, ‘wounds of the past haunting the mind’, ‘indulging in the marsh of depression’, ‘two minds that want to be close and distanced’, ‘wanting to live, but feeling like there's nothing else but death’, ‘living everyday life with a slender will’, and ‘realization of myself being a good person’. I understood that college student clients’ suicidal ideation was a natural phenomenon, not pathological. Conclusion: The essence of college student clients’ suicidal ideation is the confession of painful minds and because they think that they are flawed.

서 론
    1. 연구의 필요성
    2. 연구목적
연 구 방 법
    1. 연구설계
    2. 체험의 본질에 집중
    3. 실존적 탐구
    4. 연구참여자 선정 및 자료수집
연 구 결 과
    1. 심각한 결함이 있는 사람으로 생각됨
    2. 지난 상처에 발목이 잡힘
    3. 우울의 늪에 빠짐
    4. 친밀하고 싶은 마음과 거리를 두고 싶은 두 마음
    5. 살고 싶은데, 죽는 것밖에 방법이 없을 것 같음
    6. 한 줄기 의지로 일상을 살아냄
    7. 내가 ‘괜찮은 사람’이라는 믿음이 생김
논 의
결 론 및 제 언
REFERENCES

• 이정빈(대전대학교 아동교육 상담학과 강사) | Lee Jeong Bin (Lecturer, Department of Child Education and Counseling, Daejeon University, Daejeon, Korea) Corresponding author